On Halloween, I had a notable late night shave taking a different approach. Too lazy to fetch another pumpkin pop from the freezer in the basement, I took a sprinkle of a more powerful acid -- citric acid -- from a new jar recently installed in the medicine cabinet. Together, citric acid and potassium bicarbonate make something like Alka-Seltzer, only without the aspirin.
Having eaten a ripe banana, with the skin (can't really call it a "peel" anymore), and still feeling dry, I again skipped the Witch Hazel, reserving it for the end. I wanted as gentle a shave as possible. Just for comfort, my own personal pleasure. Shave Secret took the lead, followed by the seltzer serum. I didn't try to remove the oil until after that. Finally, Williams, in the fastest palm lathering ever, probably 30 seconds from picking up the soap cup to finished lather. Somehow I just nailed it; loving the new puck, but perhaps the oil and serum residues contributed something, too. The sensation of the brushtips receded, and I wrung it through once just to be sure, but that was the right amount of water, alright.
Cold water shave. Stella and Racer, on his last legs. Didn't matter. Less than perfect hair softening still allowed remarkable efficiency, and with the blade loosened I took the time to pull the skin for erect follicles in the critical areas from the jaw up. Second pass was focused on skin preservation and no pressure, at moderate pitch angles; then I opened her up again for a close finish, with some slow strokes and some fast.
Alum declared success, with only an isolated neck tingle, and held back whatever alcohol was in the splash of Witch Hazel. Another soak, then cocoa butter. Essentially, it was a shave without fragrance, or much substance penetrating the skin at all. Though, in the end, the cocoa butter and some smelly liquid hand soap we had out for the holiday combined for a fruit and nut bar effect, that I really dig. Nothing for the skin to work through. No moisturizer, no injury, just cleanliness. It was the shave I would choose if my wife asked me to shave before sex.
Welcome Bacteria
My skin yeast and fungi are really on their heels now. I casually wipe behind my ears when I shave, but that didn't cut it today, as an unusual smell of death was evident. I had to go back for that liquid handsoap to break the nasty film. But I took it as a good Halloween omen, because of what I've been reading about SCOBYs, symbiotic cultures of bacteria and yeast used in brewing kombucha tea. The megadose of fiber I received from a bowl of beans yesterday undoubtedly had something to do with the newcomers. Just maybe a little sugar overdose, too, made a good growth medium. Taking a shower for our halloween party was thus like starting a new batch of booch. You want the bacteria to get a jump on the yeast, or it ends up too boozy and lacking in benficial acids and probiotic culture.
A more auspicious smell was found in my armpits, which didn't need any washing today, but tonight signal that they, too, are in transition, going more... well, let's just say, more like my wife. Since she's out of town for a few days, I'll be smelling myself and thinking of better times. Perhaps I'll transfer that particular bacterial film to my still evidently fungal pinky toenail. (Now THAT'S what sneakers ought to smell like!)
Seriously, though, I will stop and smell the roses, so to speak, celebrating the "coincidences" at the edge of mindfulness which continue to bless me. Fiber depletes B vitamins, and kombucha is loaded with B vitamins. I already loved oolong tea, and kombucha may have been brewed with oolong originally (at least 221 BC in China). My first real batch has a good looking bubbly film, with no mold. I can't wait for it to mature, so that I can build a SCOBY "hotel," and share with friends...
Ah, the familiar insanity of manic enthusiasm. This year's crazy project, next year's crazy flea market offering and crazy Xmas gift. It could circle back and be the third year's crazy shave serum, though. Try and stop me! https://www.google.com/patents/US20060165643
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